listen to old sarge...

perhaps imagined I’m constantly catching glimpses of perhaps imagined arachnids, insects rodents and other assorted vermin scuttling through the half-lit places in the shadowy peripheries of my eye there are things you can’t put your hand on just out of sight, just out of reach who’s to say that they’re not there?

it's a dirty job I make house calls for the servicing of faulty bullshit detectors I am the industry’s pre-eminent tv-phone-sex chat line chiropractor I specialise in pre-funeral chiropody for dead and dieing third world dictators my bamboo allergy hasn’t prevented me becoming an expert giant panda fellator it’s a dirty job but someone’s got to do it it’s a dirty job but someone’s got to do it I run the clean-up crew on the QE2 when a royal orgy’s been in full swing I’ll procure a swan with bra and panties on if that’s your kind of thing I provide hand relief and retrieval of broken teeth after ill-advised liaisons with drunken priests my masters degree in koala cunnilingus has left me with an aversion of eucalyptus leaves it’s a dirty job but someone’s got to do it it’s a dirty job but someone’s got to do it

it's a dirty job I'm available for house calls to service your faulty bullshit detector I am the industry's pre-eminent tv-phone-sex chat line chiropractor I specialise in pre-funeral chiropody for dead and dieing third world dictators my bamboo allergy hasn't prevented me becoming an expert giant panda fellator it's a dirty job but someone's got to do it it's a dirty job but someone's got to do it I run the clean-up crew on the QE2 when a royal orgy's been in full swing I'll procure a swan with bra and panties on if that's your kind of thing I provide hand relief and retrieval of broken teeth after ill-advised liaisons with drunken priests my masters degree in koala cunnilingus has left me with an aversion of eucalyptus leaves it's a dirty job but someone's got to do it it's a dirty job but someone's got to do it

ahoy... you can now listen to old sarge's complete discography at  http://oldsarge.bandcamp.com/   and .mp3s at 128kbps can be harvested from your Temporary Internet Files folder (or Mac equivalent), should you so desire... if you'd like an album of a track at higher fidelty or in a different format, you can purchase albums and tracks to download... you can name your price, subject to my minimum pricing policy (see below), or for a lot of tracks specify no charge, and in exchange for your e-mail address, you can get a free download... tracks are uploaded to bandcamp in CD quality .wav format, and the downloads are available in .wav, 320kbps .mp3, or just about any other format you would like... single track pricing: £1.49 minimum long tracks £0.99 minimum standard track £0.49 minimum demo/live track £0.00 minimum short tracks, alternate versions, tracks featuring third party audio, remixes ( e-mail address required for free downl...

to celebrate the inexorable decline of myspace and revel in the dying of its light, I give you... the newest, and hopefully final, resting place for all things musical in the old sarge cannon...free music, with the option to purchase albums and tracks in a range of formats and fidelities... http://oldsarge.bandcamp.com/ my friends from Retrogramme have started their own label, and have taken me under their wing... http://www.redbasementrecords.com/ still active here, from time to time... http://www.reverbnation.com/oldsarge http://www.reverbnation.com/oldsarge#!/oldsargemusic http://www.facebook.com/listentooldsargemusic http://www.acidplanet.com/artist.asp?songs=514134&T=6589 http://soundcloud.com/oldsarge http://www.last.fm/music/old+sarge an updated biography, if I may... old sarge…a source of hearing damage, since 1971…guitar, musical alchemy, tune and wordsmithery… old sarge is the online persona/creative smokescreen of Brian Thomson of West Lothian, Sco...

excuse me....if you don't mind, I'm just going to interupt our pathalogical disinterest in each other's lives once again....while away the best part of a quarter of an hour in the company of a new piece of music, 'the unaskable question', streaming in one or three parts here and there, or download the complete track for $2.49 from my reverbnation store....listen to it four times straight, and lose an hour of your life you'll never, ever, get back again....enjoy....os :)) the unaskable question the unaskable question (part 1 of 3) the unaskable question (part 2 of 3) the unaskable question (part 3 of 3) old sarge welcomes the copying and free distribution of this music on a strictly not for profit basis copyright © 2010 brian thomson an erratic monkey production for more information: http://www.myspace.com/listentooldsargemusic

evening.... that's me sorted the 'achemy (volume 1)' ep over at the reverbnation store....a measly $4.99 for 6 tracks, or $0.99 a track, you pays your loot, you takes your choice....they've even made up some ringtones, for fucks sake....$2.49 or some shit like that.... you can also download a .pdf for a cd insert, should you be so inclined, from my skydrive .... enjoy....os  :)) fin

morning.... Friday last week I found myself with a little time on my hands and a few tune ideas buzzing around my head.... recorded on my mobile phone, these are the guitar sketches currently streaming in my myspace player.... solo guitar, no drums or fuck-all else, with a fairly abrasive sounding guitar tone, they won't be to everyone's ear....no frills sketches of ideas I want to get sorted out into full tracks.... I intend to replace them with fuller versions as they progress, treat the myspace player as a little 'demo diary' of sorts, perhaps.... seems like a good idea at the time, as all my bad ideas turn out to....hahahahaaaaa.... enjoy....os  :)) fin

good day.... the 'alchemy (vol. 1)' ep is now streaming in my reverbnation player (that's probably the noise you're hearing just now).... 1. requiem for a dream 2. season of excess 3. dexter morgan 4. the dark passenger 5. artschooldiscoindiedance 6. requiem for a dream (instrumental) the individual tracks can be puchased from my reverbnation store at a measly $0.99 a pop....320kbps mp3s, for your listening pleasure.... if I can get some artwork sorted out (sooner rather than later), I'm hoping to make it available as an album from the reverbnation store, and at a reduced price.... that's the plan, anyway....enjoy....os  :)) fin

afternoon.... if you're a guitarist, and are struggling to find a decent form on the net for jotting down your song ideas, weird chord voicings and what have you, this form I've put together might be your thing.... click HERE , and in the 'other' folder, you'll find a .zip file with a .doc, a .pdf and a .jpeg version.... plenty of chord boxes, a wee bit of room for a bit of tab for those widdly/melodic bits, and a bit of room at the bottom for some notes/what frets the chords sound good at/how you put the whole lot together and play the fucker....  ;)) I tend to play a lot of open, ringing/droney stuff with chords I have no idea what to call, hence the form....and, I don't trust my memory either, being not as young as I once was, you know how it is.... I might even get around to posting up a few of these in the future, an os 'chord of the week' kinda nonsense....we'll see.... anyway, time to get back to the grindstone....enjoy....os  :)) ...

good afternoon.... I've uploaded a new track, 'artschooldiscoindiedance', to my various pages/players hither and yon across the internet.... that should be the noise you're hearing just now from my reverbnation widget in the sidebar to your right, if it's working as well as it normally does.... if you like what you hear, and have a measly $0.99 to spare, you can also purchase a 320kbps mp3 of it from my reverbnation store....other tracks are also available....  :)) as you may have guessed from its title, it's a little number for y'all to jig around your handbags to, girls and boys, but with enough guitar action to keep the less effeminate of us from losing interest (hopefully)....hahahahaaaa.... it was going to be called 'artschooldiscogayboyindiedance', as I think it has a touch of the Franz Ferdinand in there, and well, you can work out the rest....but I thought that may cause offence and, well, that's not the idea....the track is off...

greetings, gentle listeners.... old sarge....guitar, musical alchemy, tune and wordsmithery....making the most of my meagre talent, hahahahaaaaa....  :)) "I've invented a new genre....this is what I call '(can't and won't) dance music'....why? why not...." :)) this '(can't and won't) dance music' encompasses a bunch of other genres, namely and often simultaneously (though not exclusively and, in no particular order).... industrial....idm....drone....shoegaze....indie....soundtracks/cinematic/film music....dark ambient....you know, I just throw sounds I like at the wall and see what sticks....  :)) I have profiles at myspace, reverbnation, acidplanet.com and, if you really insist, facebook....and at a bunch of other sites, here, there and everywhere, last.fm, jango.com, etc, etc....there's links over there to your right....or google 'listentooldsargemusic'.... you can listen to all my stuff on the reverbnation player,...